McArabia

I rented a bike yesterday and took a long ride down by the water and through the city. At a park by the water, families were out picnicking and the kids were playing. Even though the temp was around 90 or more, all the women still were wearing full all-black abayas in the sun. Later on my ride I saw this sign in front of the mosque near where I live. I am pressed for time, so I can't think of anything funny to say about this yet, so the picture will have to say it all.

Paco's

Ok. I should have listened to my SoCal compadre here and NOT eaten at Senor Pacos. But the food on base was really getting to me and the Mexican dude in the sombrero in the window looked inviting from a block away. How bad could it be? Well, first of all, it was a Bangladeshi in the sombrero. Second, the menu was in Arabic. Third, they kind of aren't really sure about the difference between marinara sauce and ranchero sauce, because my relleno was covered in the former. It was like veal parmsean at first taste then my mouth got all confused when I started chewing. The beef enchilada I think was filled with hamburger helper sloppy joe mix - maybe with not so much beef. Rice was I think chopped up top ramen with peas. The beans tasted like canned - but after they were microwaved for too long then sent here via airmail. I was writing this review when my wife called to let me hear my baby girl say "bye-bye," so dinner wasn't so bad after all. I think no more Paco though for me. And don't try Googling Paco, because I'm pretty sure this isn't the kind of place that people would take pictures of and put online - just the kind wannabe food critics put on their lame blogs.

And I know - POST PICTURES! I have to wait until I get a non-DOD computer before I can capture and upload pics from my camera. Coming soon.

Ric's, etc.

Amidst a line of broken down building on a wind-blown dirt road is Ric's Kountry Kitchen. Ric and his wife are former military that decided to turn their country cooking talents into cash - catering to mostly US military and expats looking for some good old greasy spoon home cooking. The waitress was fast with the coffee, then brought me a 2-pound breakfast burrito with beans, eggs, potatoes, sausage, cheese and salsa. The grease dripping down my forearms provided all the authenticity I needed. It was quiet in the room I was in until a couple on a date walked in - both military. Far be it from me to give dating advice, but I'm fairly certain the way to a girl's heart is not to insult all her friends. Definitely the humor I needed at the moment though - bubba spent half an hour trying to impress the girl with his very colorful estimates of the size of all her friends asses. "Letisha got grizzle hanging out her mouth and a poke chop stuffed in each hip pocket!" He added. Thanks buddy. Somehow I think youre not getting to tremendously lucky tonight. Ric has pork chops on the menu, but I think I'll pass on that dish from here on out.

Later that day, I saw a bunch of burial mounds with preserved bones in them and an exhibit of treasures from pharoah tombs. There's not much I can say about old mummy stuff that is interesting, so I'll move on. I was just thinking how isn't it weird that we go to all this trouble to bury people all nice and protect their graves, but somewhere around 100-200 years after you're dead, it oddly becomes ok to break into your grave and go through all your shit and put it in a museum?

Being out here, you try to look on the bright side alot - kind of have to. I am thankful that I did not have to watch Sanjaya one more friggin night on AI. And I know that a lot of people wonder who the hell votes for that guy. I know. I found them. The laborers here are mostly from Bangladesh and India. Getting my plate of hot brown stuff tonight, the cooks were arguing. When I got a little closer, it was the three Indians getting ready to brawl with some others over how awesome Sanjaya is. I couldn't exactly figure out everything they were saying, but I'm pretty sure those guys are doing the same thing tonight that the "poke chop" guy is.

Mallrats

Some people I knew were going to the mall so I went. Anything to get out and see a few things. The royal family gets to park their big black Mercedes' right in front of the doors. Once inside, looks just like a Western mall, but half the women are wearing all black abayas. And some of the stores sell nothing but all black abayas. You look closely, though, and they are all decorated a little bit different with embroidery and jewelry. Lots of these local folks like to wear thier sunglasses indoors too.

Most interesting thing we expereinced: We are in a bookstore that seemed a heck of a lot like Borders. Same books, magazines, greeting cards, calenders. But a gal was flipping through a copy of Cosmo and looking for the story that matched the "Is Hubby to Stupid to Know if You Cheat? Ten Ways to Keep Him That Way!" article. It was torn out. After checking several of the same issue, the same story was gone. And then all the other magazines that had risque lead stories - those pages were sliced out too. This was kind of like the Twighlight Zone, so we got out. Next two bookstores were exactly the same way. I guess the bright side is that all those wives won't know how to keep their husbands as stupid as they would like them to be. Some serious-busy censors here.

Arrival

I checked into my hotel and headed out to find some food. Ahh - McDonalds.... Went in and saw a menu with a "Shwarma Value Meal" [???] and one with a "McRoyale With Cheese" - just like the guy says in the movie. I played it safe with the "Chicken Big Mac," at least that's what I thought. Because of either that or the six shots, including anthrax and small pox they gave me before my trip sent me into a two-day flu-like nightmare.

When I was finally able to emerge from my quarters, I realized the bar scene was not the only Star Wars parallel. A unit member said she felt like an Ewok from all the dust - and the dust is so bad that you can't even see the sun on a normal day. And the town has all the beauty and achitecture of Tijuana, except for more dirt and construction and no Chicklet kids.

I stay right a couple blocks from the main mosque. Really freaked me out when I heard the call to prayer for the first time. You just stop, look around and wonder what's going to happen next, then wonder if you are supposed to do something.

Ex Pats

I know people have overused this cliche, but the last leg of my flight really was just like the bar scene from Star Wars - Really. A mix of ex-pats from everywhere, and it wasn't clear if they were all from earth. By the look of them, its no mystery why they all felt the need to leave wherever they came from in the first place. Of course, I was once again the only normal one....

Some Euro-types were all around me and were quiet until the wine started pouring. Then they started yelling over the top of their seats to each other in some indecipherable gibberish. "Talk regular English, people!!" I said [insert down-the-nose-glare here]. These people are amazing.

Headlines

On my final flight leg, I picked up a widely read regional daily newspaper and couldn't believe the headline: "Female Workers Take Group Showers to Beat the Clock." I pretty much can't add anything more to that to make it more interesting, so I won't.

Getaway

Finished medical early today and rented a car to go hang out at the beach and eat something besides Applebees. Apologies to those that wanted "local scenery." The beach weather was about 50 degrees, so the only scenery was a bunch of bundled up locals with runny noses and a redneck shouting "I'll warm you up in room 625!" from his hi-rise patio. I assume he wasn't talking to me.

Had some carnitas at Don Julios and then stopped by the Blue Crab for a drink. The bartender was a beefy bald guy with a tatoo of "Arnold" on his neck - but his name was Steve.

Hurry Up and Wait

At the base for mobilization processing. Arrived yesterday afternoon. First time here without a car, so I can't reach my favorite restaurants. Only thing within walking distance is the frozen pizza at the bar in my Q and the Applebees a mile away. I chose the latter. Riblet night was my target, but was surprised when I found that they added a full rack of babybacks to their menu - score.

Today, just spent time in medical. Lesson of the day - it helps to share SeaBee stories with the Seabee transportation guys when you don't have a car, and it helps to compliment the lead medical NCO on her BOSOX wall and tell sentimental Boston stories (including how you sat atop the big green monster) when 180 others are ahead of you.